@Bunnydurden: Sharks would be a lot less scary if they had ears.
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@timdonakowski: Just bought a set of alphabet magnets for my fridge, so this may very well be my last tweet.
@Brampersandon_: KID: I'm starting to feel like I'll never find a Coke with my name on it MOM: Just keep looking, Dangquestrious
@Jenny4ashley: No thanks, marriage. If I wanted to stop getting laid I would just start wearing crocs.