@earnestaugust: She asked if I noticed anything different about her & I said no. Then I noticed she was angrier than usual.
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@NouRahif: "Axe" is not going to help you get girls, unless you spray it in their eyes then quickly chloroform them.
@AbbyHasIssues: (Grabs store intercom) Would whoever dropped the list with “pizza” and “wine” on it in the cart come to the front? We need to be friends.
@realHamOnWry: *unexpected snow fall* Americans: “It’s the end. The apocalypse is here!” Canadians: “Huh…I might need a jacket"
@SirEvisiae: *breaks into museum* *sprays fine mist to show alarm lasers* *plays a sweet jam on boombox* *krumps right into each beam*