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@_davidlucas_: She like, literally died.
~White girls' headstones
@KevinFarzad: Hi, welcome to Starbucks! How can we spell your name incorrectly today?
@junejuly12: Guy jogging pushing stroller for two kids. But only one there. Don't think he knows he lost one.
@Robinbuble: I'm just a girl, standing in front of a guy, on the side of the highway reciting the alphabet backwards and trying to walk a straight line.
@Beatonm5: someone explain to me 72 hour protection deodorants and antiperspirants.
If you bathe everyday, that like defeats the whole purpose right??
@ariscott: For someone so concerned with marriage licenses, God sure was focused on dinosaurs for 180 million years.