@Manda_like_wine: She often thinks about what life may have been outside the asylum, had the cashier refrained from putting her change on top of the receipt.
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@AintNoFamily: I can't wait to stick my descriptive adjective all up in your noun until you verb all over my face.
@BamDebikins: Yes, mother, I have gained weight. No, it was not appropriate to point it out by pinching my muffin top in front of thirty people.
@krustythe_klown: The travel toothbrush has to be the greatest invention ever. Can you imagine having to lug around one of those regular heavy ones?