@faizziy: She once called me bae so I had to baeurry her in my backyard..
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@CheryeDavis: I always take the high road, because the colors are more psychedelic and sometimes you see a unicorn.
@RidiculousSheri: I accidentally kicked my cat off of the bed while adjusting my blankets. Now he's in the corner sadly humming a Sarah McLachlan song.
@whalesmells: When someone you don't like is eating them, chips sound like 1000 asteroids smashing into the polar ice caps.