@SortaSarcastic: She promised to teach me wax on, wax off. Only now my chest is bare, I'm frightened of candles, and pretty sure I still don't know karate.
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@_Bankrobber_: FUN GAME: when someone tells you the name of their new baby, repeat it back to them, with their surname, and say "Like the murderer?!"
@UncleDuke1969: Receptionist: "That lady in the waiting room is picking her nose." Plastic Surgeon: "Good! That'll save me some time. Send her right in."
@BlackCatBettie: If we all winked, laughed out loud, stuck out our tongues and blew kisses in real life as much as we do in texts...it would be very creepy.