@TheAlexP: She said "you look like trouble"...so I nudged her down the stairs, because I don't like people falling short of their expectations.
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@meganamram: I have a friend visiting from out of town. What's your fave place in LA to look at your phone??
@Annoyedworld: I suck my stomach in when ever I weigh myself!nnIt doesn't make me weigh less but at least I can see the numbers!
@bridger_w: If you're burglarizing a home and the owner walks in, defuse the situation by saying, "I seriously love your place"
@Sassafrantz: [date] Me: Are you a serial killer? You have to tell me if you are. Him: That's a cop. Me: Changing the subject, just like a serial killer