@DiamondLou69: She'll be coming around the Mountain when she comes. - Mountain bragging.
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@TheMichaelRock: You know that confused look that old people get when looking at new technology? I'm like that, but with salad.
@gobmentcheese: Interviewer: So, tell me a little about yourself. Me: I'm very attracted to you right now.
@PimpleEye: Thanks for the Facebook invite to your wedding cheapass. Please enjoy this FarmVille mystery gift on the occasion of your marriage.