@jergarl: Shia Labeouf always looks like he's trying to teach math after someone just waved smelling salts under his nose.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@kellysdf: Apparently, if you Google "boss" and "chloroform" from your work computer, it sets off an alarm somewhere.
@IGotsSmarts: My car broke down today. It confessed to a series of hit-and-run murders back in 2006.
@WVUPRT: Girl at engineering school: I'm like the single-most clumsy person [5 male engineering students emerge from bushes] "Did you say single?"
@drinksmcgee: I laugh at an ex who now dates an ugly man-pig… Until I realize that maybe she has a type.