@MindyFurano: Shit. Gotta huge job interview tomorrow and I have no clue where I put my prom dress
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@ArfMeasures: WIFE: Carol's hubby gives her flowers EVERY day. I'd LOVE u to do that ME: Ok [next day] ME [giving Carol flowers] No I don't get it either
@LaceyNycole: Him: How much do you love me? Me: A bit more than pizza. Him: Me: But not as much as coffee.
@AmnesiaRose: I wish I had the confidence to just randomly sit on people and start bathing myself like my cat does.