@BoomBoomBetty: Short women who cook know the difference between cooking tongs and our special “grabbing tongs” to reach items on the top shelves.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@brian_bilston: Here is a poem for #NationalDrinkWineDay entitled "The Problem of Writing a Poem in the Shape of a Wine Glass".
@JohnDuffy21: Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya.
@ewfeez: *at snowman mortuary* Ma'am was your husband's wish to be liquified or broken into chunks and thrown at the people he hated?
@FeelingEuphoric: ME (teaching driver’s ed): quick, what did that sign we just passed say? STUDENT: um ME: this is important STUDENT: *reluctantly* McDonald’s, one mile, exit 7A? ME: good. stay in the right lane and ready your blinker