@beersuds: Shouldn’t all ghosts be naked?? It’s not like your clothes die too…
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@SassyTexasGal: Sees cute guy in the parking. Drops something so I can bend over & do the sexy hair flip. Forgets I have short hair. He sees me as seizing.
@hippieswordfish: joe: siri address me as poopyhead siri: okay poopyhead *obama enters* barack: joe have you seen my phone? joe: yep here *runs away giggling*
@IamEveryDayPpl: My husband has been missing for a week, the police say to prepare for the worst... So I went to the thrift store & got all his clothes back!
@iinkedZombie: [after tee ball game] Wife: we brought snacks for the kids. Me: [w/ mouthful of food] we did?!