@Phoebetate: Shout out to my body for reminding me that, while I'm too old to have the tiny waist of a 15yo, I'm not too old for a pimple on the forehead
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@duplicitron: *returns four pounds of skirt steak to butcher* I'm sorry. This just doesn't fit me like I thought it would.
@Hormonella: "I love this song!" "This is my favorite song!" "I love this song!" "No, THIS is my favorite song!" ~ Me, listening to my own playlist
@DillDoes: *walking in forest* *tree falls and makes a loud noise* WOAH *tree gets up* *tree pull a knife on me* "You didn't hear SHIT" *tree runs off*