@markydoodoo: Shout out to my sweatpants for loving me through thick and thicker.
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@LackOfShame: Mom: "Why are you always on your phone? What's so great about the internet?" Me: It doesn't constantly ask me questions
@GrantTanaka: "I was thinking of all the shit I hate, so I made a list of all the shit I hate" *notices you don't care *adds you to list of shit I hate
@Sassafrantz: If a bear tries to attack you in the woods, give it your bicycle. Maybe it's one of those circus bears, you never know.
@INDlAN_: HER: let’s be open about how we really feel. I’ll go first I love you. ME: Ok well... I really, really, don’t want Naruto to end HER: wtf?