@RocketRankoon: Shout out to Pringles for admitting they're addictive, unlike cigarettes and heroin the two biggest liars of the snack industry.
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@ScottWesterfeld: Plot idea: 97% of the world's scientists contrive an environmental crisis, but are exposed by a plucky band of billionaires & oil companies.
@kylegotjokes: My ex just sneezed and I accidentally said "bless you" now she just staring at the bushes confused wondering who said that
@_Kim_Jongun: My latest missile blew up on the launch pad. But it exploded so fast Americav couldn't tell what type it was. I'm not telling. Checkmate.
@serialmatrix: I bought a Christmas tree today. The guy asked me if I was going to put it up myself.I said, "No, I'll probably put it in the living room."