@cervixsmash: Shout out to slugs for doing everything a snail does without a helmet
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@badbanana: Hundreds of creepy clowns terrorizing people across multiple states. On the bright side, they can all be picked up in one police car.
@rockymomax: [pulled over] COP 1: any drugs or alcohol in the car? ME: no COP 2: told you he was a nerd ME: nuh uh I have so much drugs COP 1: lol gotcha
@CheetoBandito77: *turns on shower* *gets undressed* *checks TL real quick* *floods the entire neighborhood*