@JennyJohnsonHi5: Show me a woman in a Tweety Bird t-shirt and I'll show you a woman who shoplifts in the grocery store.
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@Probgoblin: I run down a hospital corridor, clutching the mustard dispenser I liberated from the cafeteria. Earlier I had a plan. Now I have mustard.
@slimmy_shady: 20% of traffic accidents involve deer.Who allowed deer to drive in the first place?
@Teowulf: I just had to add "velociraptor" to my Microsoft Word dictionary because apparently I missed the dinosaurs expansion pack or something.