@MoistPork: Show someone you hate them by buying them an Edible Arrangement.
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@_NinJar: I was makin out with a cute girl but it got ruined when she ran her hand up my leg and squeezed all the spaghetti out of my pocket
@AsgardianRose: North Korea banned the use of sarcasm towards the government; I wouldn't last an hour before they executed me.
@RowdyBowden: Headed to the gym. Gonna work on my diptroids. My gluteralids. My quadrapeps. Maybe my trapaceptals. Definitely my vocabulary.