@Contwixt: "Shrooms before brooms," I say to the coven of stereotypical witches who have quite magically appeared in my living room.
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@MichaelGoffLA: I bought one follower just to see what it was like and he showed up at my job and his name is Eddie and he’s kind of freaking me out guys.
@thedailymarker: My husband and I play this game where we buy potato chips the other one doesn't like so we don't have to share.
@myles_morrison: Two men came to the door asking if I'd found Jesus. I said "Hell no. I don't want to have to spend my weekends bothering people at home."