@WilliamAder: Shutdown Apocalypse Update: Talked to someone today about remaining human when society crumbles. Was told to "please pull up to the window."
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@ARealTinderella: Whenever I tinker with the idea of a having a relationship, I go spend a night with my married friends.
@CMHorrocks: These racing car drivers are making a lot of pit stops. You'd think they would have went before the race.
@UrbanDouchebag: Book Of Tim, 3:13. Behold, the lord said unto them, leave not your nachos unattended for quickly they become the spoils of thieving women.
@lilgapeach30: Who the hell decided "have a happy period" was an okay thing to write on maxi pads? "NOT WORTH THE JAIL TIME" would have been more relevant.