@animaldrumss: Sir? the table of hot ladies over there wanted to know what song you were drumming on the bar. they said it seemed very fast and impressive.
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@iamnotdiddy: The most embarrassing thing about mistaking pilates class for pirates class is concealing my musket.
@NurseKimaaa: It's so awkward when a man texts you to come over and you have to pretend like you weren't already inside their house.
@shutupmikeginn: [my first cutaway on The Bachelorette] I can eat more roses than any of these guys