@mdob11: 'Siri, am I an alcoholic?', I whisper into my burrito.
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@_Water_Baby: When you are having a new mattress installed, remember to hide your "toys" BEFORE the movers arrive.
@ThaJawn: Columbus: I like it here Native American: Me too, that's why I live here Columbus: Why you 'used to live here'
@therealeatwood: Did you see saw? I saw Saw. You see Saw II? I saw Saw II too. Going to see Saw IV? I didn’t see Saw III, what am I going to see Saw IV for?