@CauseWereGuys: Siri is the only girl that answers my questions without having to ask why..
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@junejuly12: *receives invitation to dry wedding* *becomes wine smuggler and most popular wedding guest ever*
@UncleDuke1969: *cocks gun* Me: "Go ahead." Horse: "Just be cool, man." Me: "DRINK." Horse: "No problem. It's just a stupid expression."
@joeldanger: Stupid people who suddenly make a smart decision have no idea how confusing that is for the rest of us.
@DayneDimmick: I feel bad for spiders. I tripon my two feet all the time. Can only imagine the hell a clumsy spider goes through.