@markydoodoo: "Siri, what are the side effects of Valium?" I mumbled into the tv remote.
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@imchriskelly: Someone just tweeted something vague that made me think a celeb had died so I googled "dead." No dice! Thank god---hang in there, celebs!
@Wine_Honey1: The store said to “holla” if I needed help, so crying, I got on the intercom and started screaming “I need wine” & “Save me from these kids, Jesus”. And that’s how I got banned from Target.
@Cpin42: I’m sick of people blaming the Internet when someone gets killed. Watch the History Channel. Hitler didn’t find the Jews on craigslist.