@hogrider05: Siri, who's in my trunk?
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@AlanFelyk: Personal Trainer: Show me the hardest thing that you do each day. Me: *Goes out front door of gym, comes back in*
@crow_death: I'm going to put my limbs into each corner of a fitted sheet and attempt to become a sugar glider.
@AnkCoupleTO: Me: [stands under majestic tree watching leaves fall] This is beautiful [2 hours later buried under a mountain of leaves] you piece of shit