@ConcernedSirGuy: Sirs & Ma'ams, It is a well-known fact that when Jesus takes the wheel, He doesn't just stop with the wheel. He takes the stereo too.
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@ElizaBayne: Ashley Madison website is having problems. But instead of addressing them directly, it'll just look for a younger hotter website on the side
@GlennyRodge: "Do you like Tolstoy?" "Of course. Who doesn't?" "What's your favourite book?" "The one where Woody is kidnapped & Buzz tries to save him".
@xLiserx: *First Date* Me: *Flirting* You have to promise not to fall in love with me. Him: There's cheese in your hair. And we haven't eaten yet.
@Donnie_Fairburn: If nothing else, the iOS7 update has proved it's usefulness by automatically adding the little accent mark to the word jalapeño for me.