@nPhelendriqal: Slugs are obviously snails that have been through a divorce.
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@KeetPotato: advice: describing someone's cupcakes as being "better than sex" is only a compliment if you aren't sleeping with them
@AndyShulk: If you run through an airport yelling "Marybeth I love you don't go!" then you can cut through so many lines of people who like romance.
@Midgetspar: If I was a police sketch artist I wouldn't listen to the victim. I'd draw a majestic gay dragon then flip it over and be all, "Is this him."