@KyleMcDowell86: [snake charmer struggling to get snake to stand up] I swear this never happens
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@Book_Krazy: Every time I eat a cookie in bed, I imagine it screaming "I'M GONNA CRUMB" because I have something wrong with me
@JaymayAllDay: You know what celebrity they should get for Dancing With the Stars? That plastic bag from American Beauty.
@CheryeDavis: This guy must really want to impress me with his endurance skills. Because when I asked if he wanted a ride, he said "No thanks I'll walk"
@LindaInDisguise: Facebook is the biggest whistle-blower of them all, telling people I saw their messages.