@noog: Snakes are terrifying because they can't trip and fall over shit. No creature should possess such power.
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@AbrasiveGhost: ME:[defending myself] Oh yeah?? Well I got 5 words for you buddy: please be nice to me
@alexjmann: I'm going to need to see a warrant before you look through any pictures on my phone besides the one I show you.
@NoTheOtherJohn: Me: *Rubbing Chin* Why am I always hungry 30 mins after I eat Chinese food? Chin: [pushing my hand away}I dunno man I just deliver the food.