@Breadery: Snow White succumbs to avian influenza as a message against the laziness of magically hiring animals to complete household chores.
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@Carbosly: There is no life on earth without water.nBecause without water, there is no coffee.nAnd without coffee, I'll kill you all.
@Tmoney68: [Job Interview] Boss: What is your best trait? Me: Procrastination. B: How is that a positive? M: I'll give you my reasons. Later.
@kumailn: "Count down to zero silently with your fingers and then do a fist pump." - SWAT manual on breaking down doors
@dril: ME: please show me the posts in the order that they were made COMPUTER: thats too hard. heres some tweets i think are good. Do you like this