@Breadery: Snow White succumbs to avian influenza as a message against the laziness of magically hiring animals to complete household chores.
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@XplodingUnicorn: My kids lost a Barbie shoe. I dug in the trash and found one. It was from a set they didn't know was missing Now I'm looking for 2 shoes.
@OneTrickTofani: WATSON: do you even have a proper education? SHERLOCK: Elementary, my dear Watson WATSON: but, like, beyond that SHERLOCK: nah
@KeetPotato: [lightbulb store] owner: "what watt can i get you?" me: owner: me: owner: "did i stutter?" me: "i dont know"