@brentcetera: SO AFTER I CAUGHT HER CHEATING ON ME I WANTED TO JUMP OUT OF A PLANE AND DIE. ANYWAY MY NAME’S TOM AND I’LL BE YOUR TANDEM PARACHUTE PARTNER
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@bobvulfov: DONALD TRUMP (45 minutes into watching wall-e): this film is not what i hoped it would be
@tucker_doherty: Daylight Saving Time switches on November 6. That's right, this presidential campaign is an hour longer than you thought.
@DevilryFun: While I might feel unsure how to react, my middle finger is well versed in handling stupid people.