@andylassner: So Amish people just yell their tweets from the top of their barns?
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@TheMichaelRock: Me: Got a hot date this weekend? Coworker: Ummm...no. Me: I know. I was just reminding you. Coworker....
@addmoreninjas: That's nice that you're a Christian now. Could you maybe be a Christian a little quieter?
@E_lok44: He asked why I put my stick figures on my dash, not the bumper. I had to explain that it was an actual photo of my relatives.
@trevso_electric: I would rather weave a suit out of my grandfather's pubic hair than "pull an all-nighter" with you.