@Tmoney68: So, Facebook is celebrating its 10th birthday. What do you buy for the social media app that makes you hate everyone?
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@TheTweetOfGod: Nancy Grace just called pot smokers "fat and lazy". Right. Unlike the buff marathon runners home 4 o'clock on a Monday watching your show.
@WheelTod: "Children can be very cruel," I reassure my 6 year-old. "But sometimes it seems like you aren't even trying."
@Book_Krazy: Boss: This is the 3rd time I've seen you slacking off today. Do you know what that means? Me: You want me to move the couch into my office?
@GrowlyGrego: [at bar] "Yeah I pulled down a solid 6 figs last year." Whoa that's impressive! "I know, right! Can't believe I got fired by that fig farm."