@RealSugarFree: So far at work I've straightened a paper clip then tried bending it back to its original shape. Employee of the month right here.
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@WilliamAder: The shoulder belt retractor suddenly locked up this morning and now everyone in my car pool knows my safe word.
@CopBroughtPizza: todd: *sobbing uncontrollably* me: relax it was just a little earthquake todd's wife: he's an etch-sketch artist. it was everything he had
@NicestHippo: Thinking is hard, that's why I appreciate websites telling me in advance how I will feel about the article