@Thing_Finder: So glad I don't subtweet like SOME PEOPLE.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@CooperLawrence: Netflix documentaries convinced me I should be vegan. So I did what any American would do. I bought some bacon and canceled Netflix.
@YesThatAmy: This chick at Walgreens is totally hitting on me. What's your name? What's your address? Do you have any questions for the pharmacist?
@rodney_at_large: If the final comments of your speech last 45 minutes, please don't preface them with "and lastly".