@sozjalltheway: So, It's not ok to write "always best to have a spare incase you break the first one" on facebook, when someone announces a second pregnancy
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@TitansHomer: My daughter just asked for a Samsung Galaxy phone. Had to sit her down and explain to her we aren't poor. #iPhone
@AdamTheLobster: This may be racist but whenever I have a test in class I try to get a seat next to a dolphin because they are usually really smart.
@jonnysun: me: helo darkness my old friend darkness, who just turned 30 and is totaly self-conscious about his age: cmon man im not old
@FSUSteve: My mom just replied to my text with "K." Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?