@GeorgeTakei: So let me get this straight: Trump supporters are butt hurt because someone overgeneralized them and called them a mean name? Oh, the irony.
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@PabloGSerski: The secret of a long marriage is accepting the utter euphoria you would feel from strangling your spouse to death isn't worth life in jail.
@GreenishDuck: One day a guy named Matt banged a waitress and nine months later a mattress was born haha just messin around on this website.
@AmishPornStar1: If you accidentally use Pam cooking spray instead of Off... It still works, because the mosquitoes just slide off your legs.
@DrDogMD: CAT: Can u check my blood pressure? DR DOG: *places cuff around cat's neck* Sure CAT: Shouldnt that go on m- DR DOG: *inflating cuff* Ssshhh