@Hellaphantitis: "So let's name the turtles after the most influential artists and their sensei we'll name after this lil piece of wood stuck in my foot"
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@LuvPug: Just pulled into the 'Expecting Mothers' parking spot at Walmart because I'm fully expecting to lose my shit on one of my kids in there.
@jake_lach: Dog ate raw chicken so I called the vet to see what I could do He asked what I think they eat in the wild. Basically, he called me an idiot
@Sickayduh: "Your name is Duck?" It's Doug. "Yeah. Duck" Doug. "Duck?" DouGGG "Got it. Duck" Go fuGG yourself "Haha. Classic Duck"