@CMFC99: So me and my demons are gonna have a few bloody mary's and see where the day takes us. Would you and your demons like to tag along?
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@GrantTanaka: *strips off clothes, stands on desolate highway holding sign saying "Last Naked Guy For 75 Miles"
@Kali_Mura: Cop: So, I’m writing a ticket for driving alone in the car pool lane. Me: You’re going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk.
@zero3_benz: You ever notice that the most dangerous thing about marijuana is getting caught with it?
@ThisOneSayz: "So I go east? Then west? Then back east?" ~ Me, drunk and getting directions from the inflatable stick figure in front of a car dealership