@JaneBadall: So sorry I hit a nerve. I was actually aiming for a major artery.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ThatEggChick: I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now.
@MomofTeen: Customer Service: How does the name appear on your credit card? Me: If i had to guess, I'd say it's 11 pt. Arial bold.
@KeetPotato: [inventing humans] god: "they should have complete control of their tongue" angel: "um ok" god: "let me finish.. except when using scissors"
@TheHyyyype: [commandos infiltrating enemy fortress] COMMANDO 1: uh oh, we've got company! COMMANDO 2: damn *opens wine and begins to set table*