@JesKeepSwimming: "So tell me more about yourse-PUT DOWN MY FRIES IF YOU WANT TO WALK OUT OF HERE WITH ALL 4 LIMBS INTACT." - What not to say on a first date.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@robfee: Make your employees work 8x faster by constantly playing that music from Sonic the Hedgehog when you've been under water for too long.
@erica_rosie: One time I smashed my face into a keyboard and accidentally wrote the fifth Twilight book.
@Sarcasticsapien: I think first dates should just be writing down the bad stuff from your past and sliding it across the table like you're making an offer.