@noog: So the ex texted me
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@causticbob: Yelling at a dog to stop barking doesn't work. The dog probably just thinks, "Awesome, now we're both barking."
@thenoahkinsey: When you don't even acknowledge I held a door open for you, I want to pull you back inside by your neck, and say "now let's try this again."
@shanethevein: Wait, there's a big difference. Did you say I look like THE Rock or did you say I look like A rock?
@_MustBeArkaydia: Twitter is all fun and games until you get that text asking what that tweet was about.