@Breadery: Social Life Status: My friends are balloons with faces drawn on them. Stuart. My best friend. Popped two days ago.
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@MomOfTeen: Me: I need to lose my baby weight. Diet coach: Awww, how old is your youngest? Me: Thirteen.
@daemonic3: [1st date] HER: I love the idea of marriage. What are your thoughts on it? ME: [trying to impress her] I have 6 wives
@MindyFurano: Juicing changed my life. I went from being overweight, to being overweight and owning a juicer.