@_youhadonejob: Social media explained.
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@DonQuickoats: When I see drivers with tinted windows I still stare at them in their eyes, or where I think their eyes are, so they think I'm superhuman
@PaperWash: People without kids: I'll never yell at my kids People with kids: I DONT KNOW WHY SOMEONE SPIT THEIR GUM ON THE ROAD JUST WALK!
@Shock_Monster: How To Get Rich: 1. Place a Swear Jar next to Samuel L Jackson. 2. Empty it the next day. 3. Become a millionaire.