@OhNoSheTwitnt: Social media is great. Before Facebook I'd never know what the girl who wrote "dirty Jew" on my 8th grade locker was thankful for this year.
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@veronaway2: I admire the guy who named duct tape. He was a marketing genius. He knew naming it abduct tape would be more accurate, but a harder sell.
@TitansHomer: I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.
@OctoberJones: In honour of Agatha Christie, turn off all the lights and kill one of your work colleagues.
@heatherlou_: Google just alerted me to light traffic in my area which is odd because I'm in the bathtub.