@MotherJonestown: STAGES OF DRUNK:
1. Wow. I can dance.
2. All hats look GOOD on me.
3. Shhh. Don't wake up the cows.
@flashember: ME: I have so many questions
SOOTHSAYER: forsooth
ME: Exactly lol
S: SOOTH
ME: Yeah so-
S: Sooth?
ME: You only say sooth eh
S: *nods* sooth
@JarrettsPosts: my grandpa doesn’t use his blinker because “its no one else’s business where he’s going”
@mrsjohngoodman: I ran over someone and now there's a bunch of flowers where it happened. It's like, I came back to apologize, not be lavished with gifts
@bingowings14: *Runs fingers over Braille calendar*
Is this a date? It feels like a date.
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