@samalmightysam: Some days you're just really stupid. 365 to be exact.
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@AnOrangeSNES: [Kitchen] Me: I'm a were-state. When the moon is full I turn into a US state. Wife: No you don't the moon is full now. Me: *Illinois noises*
@Reverend_Scott: RANGER: watch out for wolves ME: oh ya? RANGER: so relentless- [wolf runs up w/ bible] HAVE U HEARD ABOUT OUR LORD & SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST
@Ilovelamp1979: One of the worst things about tweeting while driving is all of the people that seem to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk.