@samalmightysam: Some days you're just really stupid. 365 to be exact.
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@Scdavis24: I emailed my ex-girlfriend "Are you still alive" and she emailed back "No" which made me sad but also excited that they have email in hell.
@breadzeppellin: My wife and I had a real Fairytale wedding. A wolf killed her grandma during the ceremony and then we ate stolen porridge from some bears.
@Home_Halfway: Congrats on your new baby. I remember a night where you drank a fifth of Jim Beam and crapped yourself. Glad you're raising a child now.
@karanbirtinna: Sheepdog: Here are your 40 sheep. Farmer: But I own only 36. Sheepdog: I know. I rounded them up.