A bunch of bras is called a support group.
Thanks for following.
You Might Also Like
If they cause you to have anxiety & panic attacks the majority of your relationship, move on.
In related news, I just broke up with my mom
5 and 11 months: When I was a baby six years ago I was happy.
Me: You weren’t born yet then.
5: No, I mean when I was in your tummy. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want and it was dark and warm.
Me: *Sigh* And you didn’t fight with me on eating your dinner either.
“I’m telling you, it’s all or nothing,” the exterminator explains to Noah, “I can’t just leave 2 woodworm. It doesn’t work like that.”
Eternal damnation for the sorry acquaintance who cons you into watching his favorite film and keeps looking to see if you’re reacting.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.
Twitter: Hold my beer.
Am I the most attractive woman out there ? Of course not. But do I have a good personality ? Well, no. But do I wake up every day and try to be the best person that I can be ? Also no.
[Takes dog to park]
*waits for romantic comedy to begin
– Are you upset?
Typing…
Typing…
Typing…
Typing…
– No.
Hey did you know that if you step on the gas and brake at the same time your car takes a screenshot.
life has a lot less pushing cars filled with dead bodies into bogs than I was led to believe
Apparently the g-spot is located in a $1700 pair of Christian Louboutins.
me: hey cat what are you up to
cat: ʜᴀɪʟ ʟᴜᴄɪᴘᴜʀʀ
me: what
cat: meow
TWIN: so our parents split us up at birth, never told us about it, and pretended the other parent was dead?
OTHER TWIN: yes
TWIN: omg let’s get them back together it’ll be so cute
I follow girls that walk to their cars alone because there’s a lot of weirdos out there.
Just saw an advance screening of Age of Ultron. Spoiler alert: he’s 47
I know you all think *I’m* the chaotic one in my family, but a baboon troop just broke into my sister’s house and stole two jars of peanut butter and her husband chased them off with a baseball bat, an event she relayed by dropping a video with no explanation in the group chat
Westboro Baptist Church Founder Fred Phelps Dies At 84.Who wants to protest a funeral?
INTERVIEWER: tell me about a time you refused to compromise
ME: no
I took Social Studies for so many years, but I still don’t know how to socialize
Neighbour: I see your wife took the garbage out last night
Me: It’s called date night and we had a nice time
when i die please avenge my death regardless of the circumstances
what
PRIEST: Do you take this this woman, to have and to hold, for better, for worse, until death do you part?
ME: Well, now you made it weird.
*Pops up out of your shower drain.
You really should look into a home security system. Let me tell you why ADT is right for you.
At the young age of 5, a bear told me that I am the only person who can prevent forest fires. Why I was chosen, I’ll never know.
You look like the kind of girl who would break my heart.
I have a boyfriend.
See, you’re done it already.
I stand at airplane arrival gates with a “SAMANTHA” sign, then cry after everyone’s exited until airport security brings me soup. Free soup!
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? You smell of bins.
I called the neighbor boy a ruffian, and now I’m writing a terse note in calligraphy to send off to his mum via carrier pigeon.