@BruceForce: Some dude told me he's had 100 times more girls than me which made me laugh so much because 100 x 0 is still 0.
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@mrtruthandsoul: Me: ... Dog: ... Me: ... Dog: ... Me: .. Dog: .. Me: ... Dog: .. Me: .. Dog: .. Me: ... Dog: ... (Women, take note *ahem* Man's best friend)
@Jake_Vig: HER: I don't know what you'd do without me. ME: HER: Please stop imagining all those things. ME: Ok.
@ericONEderful: A naked man brushed his teeth next to me as I washed my hands. This is why I don't go to the gym often.
@Reverend_Scott: [Apple meeting] We need an honest iPhone 6 slogan. "How about, iPhone 6: Yesterday's technology at tomorrow's prices." Too honest, Carl.