@Cpin42: Some lady at Olive Garden died, so we’re rummaging through her stuff. Just like a real family.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@gagging: If you think marijuana doesn't kill you've obviously never read the bible. People getting stoned to death left and right.
@SomthinBoutSara: Ever listened to 90s R&B lyrics? Sex you up? Licky boom-boom down? No wonder none of us know what the hell were doing in relationships
@Reverend_Scott: [job interview] How would you improve our business? "Dude, I'd bankrupt you in a week. I'm just catchin Pokemon in your office."
@jonnysun: "911 whats ur emergency" omg im DYING "we'll send someone right awa–" i met THE funiest guy "ok wait so ur not actualy–" AND HE STABBED ME